KIDS WILL DO CRAZY THINGS FOR PEOPLE THEY CARE ABOUT

I don’t know that there is much you can do in the classroom more powerful than building relationships..

We all know that, right?

The reality is, so many times when I go to classrooms where the teachers aren’t exactly thrilled with student behavior, one of the key elements at play is that the teacher has never really spent time connecting with their students.

I hear a wide variety of reasons why ranging from, “There isn’t enough time,” to“I honestly don’t like the kid.”  Whatever is holding you back, know that there are options- simple options that make a huge difference.

Here are my favorite two.

ONE

Take a sticky note and write a compliment to a student.  It can be as simple as, “Great job taking a risk and answering a question today."  Or, “I really liked seeing a smile on your face.”   It’s the noticing that is powerful.  Take the sticky note and fold it over, placing it on their desk before they enter the classroom.  Parents have told me that students will treasure these for months and sometimes years.  Your words are far more valuable to them than you realize and go a long way in forging a relationship.

TWO

Another option is to make what I call a positive phone call.   You are probably thinking, “Oh, ya, I’ve done that.”  But, this is different.  You make the call in front of the class.  I randomly drew a student name a couple of times a week and made a call to their parents.  Regardless of the experience the student had in my class that day, I found some way to compliment them.  I kid you not, I had dads crying on the phone!  It broke my heart to learn that for many students, this was their first positive phone call.  While is ideal in elementary, it can also be effective in middle school. It was a game changer, and watching my students’ beam was worth the effort.

Ultimately, the connections that were built between us were transformative.  When push came to shove and consequences needed to be doled out, it was a different game….one in which there was mutual respect and caring.  And, as you know, kids will do crazy things for people they care about.